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Top Tips to Manage Anxiety
We have all experienced anxiety at times. Although it feels very unpleasant, it has an important function: it is an emotion that is designed to keep us safe. But sometimes, anxiety feels out of control and gets in the way of enjoying life.
Here are some practical techniques you can try to help manage anxiety and feel calmer and more in control.
What is anxiety?
Our brain has evolved to protect you. Anxiety is the fight-or-flight response which is triggered when your brain believes you are in danger. This response causes a rush of hormones - adrenaline, noradrenaline and cortisol – to course through your body.
The effect of this is to increase the glucose levels in your muscles (so you can run fast), increase your breathing and heart rate to send oxygen quickly around your body, and tense your muscles ready for action.
Your temperature increases and you may get sweaty palms (the sweat gives more grip if you have to climb a tree or throw weapons).
Your digestion is affected: maybe your tummy feels upset, or you need to run to the loo.
When you are in danger, your subconscious takes over from the rational thinking part of your brain. After all, it is better to get quickly away from something that might be dangerous and ask questions about it later, rather than waste time trying to figure out what to do.
This can result in finding it hard to think straight, cause ‘brain-fog’, and can affect your short-term memory.
This is all very useful if you are suddenly attacked by a bear or threatened by an avalanche.
It is not so helpful if you are nervous about an exam, feeling shy about going to a party, or worrying about giving a presentation.
The fight-or-flight response is effective, but not sophisticated. It is unable to recognise nuances and will put you on red alert until the (perceived) threat has gone.
Like the smoke alarm in your kitchen, you need to know when the house is on fire, but you don’t need for the alarm to be raised when you’re just toasting bread.
In many situations, you need to be able to tell your anxiety that it is not required, because there is no actual danger.
There are lots of methods you can use to inform your brain that there is no danger and by doing so, reduce your levels of anxiety.
Your brain works on a feedback loop: when you sense danger, your brain sends messages to your body to make physical changes.
However, conversely, your brain also picks up on those physical changes and interprets them to mean you are in danger. This means by changing your bodily responses, you can send signals back to your brain to let it know that you and your environment are safe.
There are several ways you can do this:
Breathing
Slowing your breathing right down helps calm the parasympathetic nervous system and sends a message to your brain that there is no danger.
Here are three simple breathing exercises to try out. Unless stated otherwise, breathe through your nose while you are doing them if possible:
4- Square Breathing.
Breathe in for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, breathe out for a count of 4, pause for a count of 4.
Repeat a few times.
Longer on the out-breath
Breathe in for a count of 3, then breathe out more slowly for a count of 5. Repeat three or four times.
A long, slow outbreath is very calming.
Whoosh-out breath
Take a long breath in through your nose, then ‘whoosh’ out the breath quickly through your mouth. Do this to or three times to release tension.
Relax
It is very common to tense up when you are anxious or stressed. Become aware of how your body holds tension in your muscles and try to consciously relax them.
Start by scanning your whole body, noticing where you are holding tension. Wherever you notice tightness or tension, relax the muscles. Particularly notice:
· Are your shoulders up around your ears? Drop them down.
· Are your hands clenched? Open them and face them palm up, or shake them out.
· Is your jaw clenched tight? Relax it and wiggle it a bit. Even stick your tongue out!
Shake out the tension from your shoulders, arms, hands and legs.
Keep doing this every time you notice yourself tensing.
Cool down
Reducing your temperature can counteract feeling of anxiety. Maybe take off a layer of clothing, stand by an open window or go outside for a quick break.
You can also try splashing cold water on your face or running your wrists under cold water.
Act normal
If you continue to act as normal, you will reassure your subconscious that all is well.
If you are in the supermarket, keep shopping calmly.
In the office, talk to your colleagues, send another email.
Eat something / chew gum
This will confuse your brain, as we don’t stop to eat if we are in danger.
Smile!
You cannot be in danger and be happy at the same time. Try arranging your face into a gentle smile, even if you are not feeling particularly happy.
Posture
Notice how you are standing or sitting.
Are you hunched up? Head down? Arms wrapped around you?
Try standing straighter, hold your head up and relax your arms by your side. You are not looking to stand rigidly to attention like a soldier, but to have a relaxed, confident upright posture.
If it helps, think about the most confident person you know and channel how they stand or walk.
Distraction
Engage your rational brain by:
Counting objects around you (e.g how many blue things can you see? How many right angles are there in the room?);
Reciting the alphabet backwards;
Counting backwards from 100 in 3’s.
Doing a simple word game on your phone
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is about being very aware of where you are in the present moment.
Notice how the ground feels beneath your feet, how your bottom feels on your chair.
Notice the air temperature - can you feel a draft?
Touch an object nearby, notice if it is warm, cold, hard, soft, smooth, rough etc.
Name three things you can see, three things you can hear, and three things you can smell
Describe to yourself how you are feeling, for example, “my heart is beating fast; my breathing has changed; I feel hot and sweaty”
Reassurance
Tell yourself you are safe, everything is ok, you can handle this.
Remind yourself that this is anxiety.
Talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend or a child who was scared.
Exercise
Get rid of the nervous energy by jumping up and down, or shaking yourself hard.
Calming sounds
Listen to relaxing music or nature sounds such as birdsong or beach waves.
Relaxation
Try listening to a guided relaxation audio to help you unwind and release tension. You can listen to my free guided relaxation here.
Some of these techniques will work better for you than others; choose that ones that you find the most useful.
You might have to do them several times to reduce your anxiety. Maybe it will work for a short time, then the anxiety comes back.
Keep doing it, and slowly the feelings of anxiety will reduce and incidents will happen less frequently.
Looking for support with anxiety?
If anxiety is affecting your work, sleep, relationships or everyday life, you don't have to manage it alone.
I offer psychotherapy, EMDR and hypnotherapy for anxiety and panic attacks, with face-to-face sessions in Finchley, North London, and online appointments.
Please share this article with anyone who might benefit.
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